Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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