so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
