Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
