This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
