I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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