are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize