The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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