we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
