Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
