Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I would ride that face into the sunset
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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