I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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