Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
as a side note pls kill me
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