Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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