operation harelip BJ is a go
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Randomize