You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
