Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
