I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
