whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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