my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
