All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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