You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
