Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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