Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
