She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize