quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
