3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I look better un-naked...
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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