Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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