He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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