she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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