Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
