this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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