Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
My vagina just recognized that song.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
