How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I smell stomach acid.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I'm at about main and main street
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
