no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
