Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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