after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
