is your mom at the bar?
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
