gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
