Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
