if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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