just tell him i said nine months
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize