So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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