I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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