dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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