There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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