I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My cat gives me a boner
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
