they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
