Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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