I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
