I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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